If You Save Me From Me, I'll Save You From You
by Brokenxmelodies
Summary: Summary sucks. Zig was forced into marrying Tori, but after a tragic accident, Zig is a single father. His life is falling apart. Maybe a certain blue-eyed blond can save him from hiself? Can he save her from her own misguided ways of life?
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! This is a future fic that I wrote for Maya and Zig! I love them together, and wish they were together on the show! Please give this fic a chance! I know the begining is short, but it's just to kinda explain the story line. I think I'll switch between Zig and Maya POV, but for now it's all Zig POV. Enjoy!

I don't own degrassi, Zig, or Maya or Tori or any other characters except some made up ones!

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><p><strong>If You Save Me From Me, I'll save You From You<strong>

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><p><strong>Zig POV:<strong>

I just stood there, staring at the casket. What had I done? Why did I deserve for my wife to die in a car accident? I supposed she had it coming, as awful as that sounds. With her cheating on me, partying like she was in college, taking our 2 year old son to several bars… The list of reasons why she deserved this went on and on. Maybe she deserved this, but did I?

In the last month of Tori's and my relationship, we fought constantly. She was the #1 model for a high-end fashion company called Wilson &Co. I was a sketch artist for a TV show called Harry & Henry, an adult comedy about two men who did hysterical things with their friends, always end up getting into some kind of trouble all while making you laugh your brains out. Her job caused her to act immature, to act like she was 20 years old. However we weren't 20, we were 26. True, Tori really never got to have a 20s. She had gotten pregnant (by accident) and we'd gotten married at age 20, not even finished with college. I'd gone to Columbia University in the States and was top of my class.

However, Tori came down to Columbia on a trip to visit her good friend, Maya, conveniently after Maya and I had broken up on account of her moving across the country to be in an orchestra. She'd be an American citizen and I would be forced into moving back to Canada. She wanted me to come, but there was no way I could. You see, her father had been born in America, so she was allowed to stay. I wasn't. Tori had been at a party, one thing led to another, and after so many shots that the room was spinning (trying to drink away my depression over Maya) I made a very drunken, extremely stupid move. I slept with Tori. Apparently I'd slept with Tori five times. Apparently it was the best sex of her life. Apparently I wasn't that drunk. But these things were all Tori's words and I knew I was very, VERY drunk; and then, two weeks later, she called me telling me to, and I quote, "Set a date because I'm pregnant with your baby, Bastard!" this had shocked me less than waking up next to a naked Tori in my friend Eric's bed.

All these thoughts, memories came back to me, just resulting in rage toward my now deceased wife.

Now just stoodd there, gripping the casket, trying to decide what my last words to her should be. I was settling between "Got to hell, you bitch" or "I never loved you, you whore" when a girl tapped on my shoulder.

I slid over, allowing he to see the casket, as I mentally tried really hard to come up with something nice to say to Tori's lifeless carcass. I finally found something.

"You had really nice teeth Tori. You saved me a fountain in dental bills." I said. "Which was surprising because you drank like an ox." I added, not meaning for the last part to come out, even though it was very true.

"You seemed fond of her." A vaguely familiar voice said sarcastically. I chuckled.

"She was my wife," I said, brushing a curl that had falled out of place off of Tori's forehead. "A lying, cheating, whore, but still my wife." I added.

"Wow, you two had issues." The voice said.

"Would you call taking your two year old son to a bar and forgetting him there because you were so drunk an issue?" I asked. I hadn't looked at the woman, she was probably some model Tori knew.

"She did that?" The voice gasped.

"Yup." Was all I could return, the memory pounding in my head. Tori had taken our younger son, Alec, to a bar and forgotten him there. I'd been at a doctors appointment with my older son who was 6, Seth. Seth had liver desease and was okay now, but had suffered a lot in the past three years. Tori was never there for either of our kids.

"She did a lot of things. Like tricking me into bed with her six years ago."

"Sounds _wonderful_." The voice said sarcastically.

"I'm just wondering what I did to deserve to be a single father of two boys." I said.

"No one deserves that." She said. She touched my shoulder, and I think I felt sparks fly.

"Did you just shock me?" I asked, knowing I felt some sort of electricity between her soft hand and my shoulder.

"Nope." She replied, still watching Tori. I hadn't looked at this girl, but she was really sweet. And she was soooo familiar…I turned to her.

She was turned toward me, a soft smile appeared on her lips. Her delicate face was beautiful in every way. Her eyes, those big blue eyes, stared into mine as she smiled at me a bit.

"Maya?" I whispered once I saw the beautiful woman staring at me.

"Hey Zig." She replied, rubbing my shoulder. "I'm back."

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><p><strong>AN: What do you think? Please review! :) And thanks for reading! Without readers, I'd quit writing. I'm feel like this is what I'm meant to do and you guys inspire me to keep going. With my parents fighting, I pour my hurt feelings into my writing and you guys really make me wanna continue :) Thank you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys! Thanks for the wonderful review! **

**This story will be dedicated to 2526! **

**I'm really happy you loved my story, and your review honestly touched my heart :) **

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

**Zig POV:**

Maya. Was. Back. She ripped my heart out of my chest and left me for her career, and now she was back.

Maya had attended Julliard full scholarship while I attended Columbia partial scholarship. She left right after she graduated to go play for a famous orcistra in California, leaving me alone with a very pregnant Tori. We'd kept in touch a bit after she left. She'd write me letters about how much she loved her new life, but missed me with all her heart. I'd sent her sketches I'd saved of her, a demo of a song I'd written for her when Tristan, Maya and I were in a band, things of that nature. But soon our letters got scarcer and scarcer as time went on, until they finally stopped for good four years ago.

"Maya, you're here." I breathed. She was wearing a simple black dress, her hair simply hanging on her shoulders and back, but still looked more beautiful than my supermodel wife ever had.

"Tristan called me." She said. "Tori was that horrible, huh?" She asked after a minute. I hesitated, knowing she was one of Tori's best friends, but decided to continue.

"Yeah…she's no Maya Matlin." I said. She smiled.

"I've missed you, Zig." She said, rubbing my shoulder again. I didn't wanna tell her how good it felt, but I think the look of lust on my face gave it away. "You like that?" She giggled.

"Mmm," I moaned, closing my eyes. Maya coughed and I reopened my eyes to see Tori's mother glaring at me.

"Hey, Mrs. Santamaria." I said. Her grey eyes were puffy and she looked as if she'd been crying for days.

"Already moving on, I see." She spit. Then she pushed me to the side. Maya and I watched as she wept over her daughter's body.

"It's so sad," Maya said. I put my arm around my old friend's shoulders.

"Yeah…" I replied. My heart felt heavy with sadness at her death, because she was such a big part of my life. But at the same time, she really meant nothing to me and I was relieved that she would no longer put my children in danger.

"Wanna get out of here soon?" Maya whispered, a tear rolling down her cheek. I brushed it away.

"More than you know." I replied. Maya and I waited for a while, watching friends and family as they said their goodbyes to my wife. Finally, the two of us were the only ones in the room.

**Maya POV:**

Finally, the two of us were the only ones in the room. Zig went and stood over the casket, just staring at Tori. Her perfect face was pale as the artic snow. Zig was on his knees, hunched over the casket, with his eyes closed.

"Daddy?" A small voice asked. I turned around to see a tiny baby no older than two.

"Chris," Zig said, standing up and walking over to the little boy. "Where's Grandma?" Zig asked, picking up the little boy. He clutched to Zig's black dress jacket and white graphic t-shirt.

"Grandma told me I should say bye to mommy." He said, hiding his face in Zig's jacket. His tiny shoulders heaved up and down, thrashing violently and he whimpered.

"Chris, don't cry." Zig whispered, sitting down on a bench with Seth. I couldn't believe how much the little boy looked like Zig.

"I'm sorry, Daddy. Things are different now." He whimpered to his dad.

"Shhh, Chris, it's alright. Things will still be the same." He said.

"Promise you'll still be daddy?" He asked, looking up for the first time. Zig was really comforting to the boy. He soothed him, and I could tell he was really good with kids.

Once the boy had calmed down, Zig walked with him up to the casket. Zig helped the tiny child stand up to he could see into the casket.

"Mommy." He whimpered, reaching out to her. Zig yanked the child away, right before his hand touched his mother's peaceful face.

"No, Chris." Zig said, not unkindly. "Time to get going…does Kick wanna say goodbye to mommy?" Zig asked the perfect little boy. Zig was so good with his kids; I knew he'd be a fine single dad.

"I send him in." Chris said, getting up and walking out of the room. Zig watched him go, pain striking his eyes. I sat down beside him in one of the pews of the funeral home. He rested his head in his hands. I wasn't sure how to act around Zig right now. I was head over heels in love with this man, but he seemed to be crushed.

"Zig," I started, placing my hand on his back. He turned his head, still bent over his knees, to face me.

"Maya, I'm so glad you're here." He said, pulling me into a hug.

"Dad?" A voice called. We broke our loving embrace to find a boy, no older than seven, standing in the doorway. Zig stood up awkwardly.

"Hey buddy," he said. "How's grandma holding up?"

"Eh, she'd devastated." He said. I was shocked at how grown up this young child was.

"Uh, Kick, this is Maya." Zig said, pushing his son toward me. This son looked just like Tori, same curly, dark hair, same brown eyes, same lean build.

"Hi, I'm Maya." I said, holding my hand out to the little boy. He just stared at me.

"Dad, isn't this the blond? From the yearbook?" Kick asked. I looked over at Zig, who was blushing a bright red. Blushing! Zig!

"Oh, uh…" Zig started.

"No, Dad, it is her! The one who has the lipstick kiss next to the picture of you too!" Kick said.

"Kick, that's enough…" Zig tried, but Kick was like his mother, and liked to talk.

"Yeah! The one Chris thinks is so pretty!"

"This isn't a conversation for ten feet away from your dead mother," Zig started in a stern voice.

"What was that she wrote in your book, Dad?" Kick asked. "'I love you, Ziggy, more than life itself. I still can't believe you get to go to Columbia while I attend Julliard! I can't wait until we're out of college so we can get married! We can finally stop practicing and start having real babies together. We'll be married and have kids, and never leave each other. I don't know what I'd ever do if we broke up. I love you so much Ziggy, words can't express it. Please, please be mine forever. Lord knows I'll be yours. With all my heart and all my love, Maya.'" Kick recited perfectly, quoting the exact thing I'd written in Zig's high school yearbook.

"Daddy, what were you and the blond practicing for? Like a game?" Kick asked. Zig's bashful shade of red turned ever darker, as did mine, and we both flashed back to that night.

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><p><strong><em>*Flashback to Beginning of Senior Year of High School*<em>**

**_*In Zig's Room*_**

"_Zig," Maya breathed as she kissed him. He had her pinned against his bedroom door, kissing her feverishly._

"_Maya, I need you." He murmured._

"_Ziggy, baby, I'm a virgin." She'd replied. He didn't stop kissing her._

"_We'll, we know we're gonna get married after college, so why not start practicing now?" Zig asked, working his way down her neck._

"_Aren't you a virgin?" Maya wondered as she rubbed Zig's back._

"_Yes." He replied, biting her neck. She squealed in delight. "I've been saving myself for someone special, as hard as that is to believe. You're really special, Maya."_

"_Oh good," She moaned. "I've been saving myself too. You're really special too Zig. It's scary how much I love you."_

"_Maybe we should do it, since we're both special enough." Zig joked. Maya wasn't in a joking mood. No, a different kind of mood had swept over her; she had this strange feeling that she needed Zig to be with her, to kiss her, whisper to her, touch her **everywhere**…_

"_I want to. I really, really want to." Maya said. And that was it. In no time, they had their heavy winter jackets off and Zig had picked Maya up, moving her over to his bed._

_She pulled his graphic t-shirt over his head and began to roam his abs. He slid off her dress and she worked on his jeans. Once they were both in their underwear, she'd began to pull at his boxers._

"_Maya, wait." He said. She looked confused. _

"_What did I do wrong?" She questioned, suddenly feeling very insecure with her body._

"_Maya, no, you're perfect. I was just gonna say, that I want your first time to be good for you, not me." She giggled._

"_You thought I'd really give you a blowjob?" She laughed. He blushed and she became serious. "Because I would have." She clarified._

"_Really?" He asked in shock._

"_I love you Ziggy. You're worth it." She returned._

"_I'll still make it good for you, though." He smiled sweetly, his innocent face had never looked happier._

"_Then let's do this." She whispered before removing his boxers. _

_This had been the first of many, many nights where Maya stayed at Zig's house. His mother had been going on many overnight business trips at the time, and his dad wasn't exactly in the picture, so they never got caught. And every night was pure magic._

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><p>They both flashed back to the present and looked at each other.<p>

"I guess you could call it a game." Maya said sweetly, trying not to suggest anything inappropriate for this six year old.

"Like the game of life? That's my favorite game! Mommy used to play it with me, but then she stopped." Kick said, growing sad.

"Let's say goodbye to mommy." Zig said softly, picking up his son. I just watched the loving interaction between the two.

"Mommy? Are you okay?" Kick asked. I supposed he was talking to Tori's body. Zig's face had sharp pain etched across it. "Mommy, wake up silly!" Kick called. Zig looked as if he couldn't take anymore.

"Zig, I got this." I said. Zig raised an eyebrow, but didn't argue. He just walked to the very last row in the very back of the room and watched. I held Kick on my lap in front of Tori's body.

"Who are you?" Kick asked. "And why does daddy love you?"

"What?" I wondered out loud.

"You are Maya, right?"

"Yes, I'm Maya."

"Daddy loves you! He has a picture of you in his wallet." Kick provided me with this information.

"Does he now?" I smiled to myself. He still had that picture that I'd taken for him of us by Degrassi on graduation day so long ago...

"Yeah." he said.

There was a long pause.

"Did mommy die?" He asked. I sighed.

"Yes. She did kiddo."

"I love mommy." He said, sadness filling his voice.

"I understand." I replied.

"How?" The child asked, looking into my eyes.

"My mommy died when I was a bit older than you." I told him, trying extremely hard to keep my voice from cracking. Sure, my mom had died when I was ten years older than him, but it was all the same really. Loosing a parent is hard, no matter how old you are.

"Were you sad?" his voice cracked, and tears rolled down his face.

"Very. Just as sad as you are. I missed her a lot." I told him. Kick looked up at me again.

"How'd you become happy again?" Kick wondered. I smiled slightly.

"A man named Zig Novak saved my life." I told him, remembering the day Zig literally did save my life. He saved a sixteen year old girl from shooting herself. He saved me from shooting myself.

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><p><em>*Flashback to sophmore year*<em>

_I was sixteen, and I'd just found out that my mother had died and I was devastated. I didn't want to cut my wrist, I was afraid of the slow death. However, I did want to die. I remember wanting to die with my mother more than anything. So I climbed to the top of Degrassi's roof. And I held a gun to my head. I was standing there in the pouring rain, deciding what my final words would be, when I heard something. Not something, but someone. And not just someone, but the best friend who I also just happened to be in love with. Zig was standing there, holding his own gun. Only he was pointing it at his head. This has striked fear in my heart._

_"Zig?" I'd yelled over the loud wind and rain. "Why do you have a gun? What are you doing?"_

_"Because if you kill yourself, I'm killing myself." He replied. He was going all Romeo and Juliet on me._

_"My mother died, Zig." I'd cried._

_"I know what you're going through! My father left me when I was twelve! You don't have to do this!" He'd pleaded, yelling over the wind. "Maya, put the gun down."_

_"No." he took a step toward me._

_"Maya, please." He pleaded. I could see tears running down his face._

_"No. I'm gonna do it Zig. I can't not do it. I have to." I yelled. _

_"No. You don't have to. You don't have to walk away from everything you'd built your life into. You don't have to give up smiling, and breathing, and looking, and touching and living. You can let me help you. You'll feel better."_

_"How can I do that?" I'd cried. He'd then taken a step closer._

_"By giving the gun to me." he called._

_"Why would I do that?" I'd shrieked/cried._

_"Because I love you, Maya." He'd returned, taking a step closer. He was just inches away now._

_"You do?" I called, tears still streaming down my face._

_"Of course I do." He'd said, reaching toward me._

_"But I have no one here who loves me as much as she did." I'd screamed/cried. He'd huffed._

_"Maya, I love you more than any best friend has ever loved another. My love for you is different. It's not friendly love, it's romantic love. And I'd give anything to be with you. Even my life." He replied. _

_Then he'd put his hand around the gun that my shaking hand was holding to my head. He stared into my eyes. His eyes were so green, so perfect. They made me feel happy. I loved him so much, I couldn't bare the thought of me being the reason he died. "Maya, let go." He'd said. And I did. For some reason, I'd handed him the gun. He'd stuffed it into his pocket, and then grabbed my hand, pulling me in for a hug, and taking me a few feet away from the edge._

_"I love you too." I'd cried into his shirt. He'd then picked me up bridal style and carried me back down to the ground below, where were both safe._

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><p>I came back to the child here, sitting on my lap.<p>

"Daddy saved you?" he asked, his eyes full of wonder.

"Yes he did."

"Why didn't Daddy save mommy?" he's asked me. Zig looked terrified.

"Sometimes, people can save people. But sometimes there's nothing people can do. If Daddy could go back, I'm sure he'd try and save mommy. But, mommy couldn't be saved. It was one of those times when people can't save people." I said, trying to put it softly for a six year old. Zig came over to us and put his arms around Kick.

"I have you, Kick. You, Chris and me, we'll be alright." He said, clutching the little boy close to him. Chris hugged him back.

"Why's the girl you and mommy fight about here?" Chris asked. Zig looked into his eyes.

"What?" He'd questioned.

"Mommy always said "she'd never be Maya." And you always said "yeah, Maya was something special. Not like you". Why is Maya so special?" Kick asked. I looked into Zig's eyes.

"Kick, go find Grandma, she'll drive you home. I'll meet you there soon. I love you." Zig said.

"I love you too Daddy!" Kick said, placing a sloppy kiss on Zig's face. Then he ran out of the room. Zig was truly embarrassed.

"Hey, Ziggy-" I'd started, but he cut me off.

"Maya, you should come to the Dot with me…if you wanna!" He said, almost quoting the first time he invited me out to lunch all the way back in grade 9.

"Okay…I'll come." I said, smiling. His innocent, charming eyes got softer.

"Okay." He smiled sweetly. "C'mon, this place wants to close."

"Wait, isn't there a burial service?" I'd asked. He laughed.

"Hell no. Her family's burying her in their plot. I'm not invited to the ceremony." Zig said, sounding a bit hurt.

"Zig, let me but you lunch." I said.

"Doesn't the man pay for the woman?" He asked as he helped me slid on my coat. We walked out of the funeral parlor and into the parking lot. He lead me to a black Hyundai sonata and opened the door for me. I noticed the two children's car seats in the back and smiled to myself. Zig seemed like such a good dad.

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><p><strong>*At The Dot*<strong>

"Hey, Peter." Zig called to the man behind the Dot's counter. Peter grinned and went over to the front door to give Zig a fist bump.

"Zig-my-man! What's happening?" Peter asked. Zig sighed.

"Today was the funeral." Zig replied.

"The bitch finally bit the dust, huh?" Peter asked. I was outraged. As horrible as Tori was, she was still my best friend! And Zig's wife!

"Peter! Bite your tongue!" I scolded. Peter looked ashamed.

"Sorry My, I just…wait a second!" Peter called to the almost empty Dot. "Maya! You're here!" He ran around the counter and literally picked me up in a bone crushing hug.

"Yeah, I'm back. I got a job teaching music at Degrassi, believe it or not." I laughed once he'd set me down.

"Oh god!" Peter seemed excited about something. "You two are here on a date?" He questioned, grinning like an idiot.

"My wife just died." Zig growled to his friend.

"Zig, all you've talked about for the past six years is how much you miss Maya Matlin. Maya's sooooo perfect, Maya's sooooo talented, Maya's sooooooooo damn beautiful! All you did was blubber about how she tore your heart out, threw it in the trash, and left you alone with Tori." Peter said. Zig tried to stop him, but he rambled on.

"Darcy even told me to invite you for dinner so you wouldn't have to unload your feelings about Maya crushing your soul in public. She was gonna set you up with that sister of hers, but Clare's married to that Eli dude now. He's nice enough." Peter rambled. "I just wish Maya would've come six years ago! She'd be a way better mom to Kick and Chris! I mean, all I've heard for six miserable years is how much you wanted to go back to college and propose to Maya so she wouldn't leave and take your heart and virginity with her-" Zig cut Peter off by yelling,

"Shut up! Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP! Now everyone in here knows!" Zig said, annoyed. Peter laughed.

"Oh please! Everyone here are regular customers! They know the whole story already."

"Peter, I will kill you with this napkin dispenser." Zig threatened. His eyes were serious and seemed to scream "I WILL USE THIS!" as he held up the metal box.

"Fine, fine. I'm not judging. Just go sit down at the table in the corner where you two always sat and I'll bring the usual. Maya, it's still the classic burger with melted Swiss cheese and sweet potato fries, right?" Peter asked. "And a diet coke?"

"Yes! Peter, you remembered!" I said happily, still taken aback by Zig and Peter's conversation.

"Hell yeah I did. You ordered that 99 percent of the time when you came here."

"That was high school." I laughed.

"Only 8 years ago. I honestly wasn't expecting you to get back together until the ten year anniversary, but hey! The sooner the better! This one," he said pointing to Zig. "Needs to get off my barstool. He's clogging valuable seating and driving customers away with his unmanly tears." Peter said.

"Will do." I returned, a bit confused. Zig and I sat down.

"So Maya, tell me about the last six years of your life."

"I've changed a lot." I replied. Zig smiled.

"How so?"

"I don't know…new hair cut, new clothes, new job. Things of that nature." I said. "So what the hell was peter talking about?"

"Oh god..." Zig blushed.

"And Kick said you have a picture of me in your wallet?"

"Yeah...I do. Tori always hated that." Zig laughed. "But Kick thinks your really pretty. And Chris autchually started calling you mommy. I had a glass of wine on night," He started.

"You mean you had a bottle of wine." I laughed, interupting

"A few glasses while babysitting the boys. Tori was at fricken fashion week. Anyway, I showed them the picture and told them I loved you. And Kick thought you were pretty and Chris thought you were mommy when she was younger." Zig laughed. I loved his laugh. I made me want to lean across the table and kisss him.

"Kick? You named him Kick?" I laughed.

"I was twenty years old." He defended. I chuckled.

"I think it suits him." I replied.

"Enough about me, I wanna know about you." Zig said.

"What do you wanna know?" I asked.

"Do you still believe in soul mates?" Zig wondered, leaning in. His breath was hot on my face and I almost didn't want to tell him the news. But I had to.

"Ziggy…I don't believe in love anymore. Never will." I said. His mouth dropped open. He just stared at me as the other two customers and Peter watched us as well.

"You don't still love me?" He whispered. I fought tears.

"After we broke up, I decided that my only true love had left me. No more love for me. Not then, not now, not ever." I told him. And I think I heard his heart break inside his chest.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey! I'm sooo sorry that I haven't updated any of my stories! Now, this is a little different from my other chapters, but it develops the stoy line really well :) I wrote an extra long chapter for you guys because I haven't updated in a while! **

**Here it goes :) Enjoy!**

**I don't own degrassi or Zig or Maya, but I do own Kick amd Chris :)**

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><p>I just stared at the woman I've been in love with since the first day of grade nine. My mouth was hanging open. My eyes wouldn't blink. Suddenly, I felt as if everything in the scene behind Maya blurred together, creating a water color painting. She, however, stood out, and all I could see was her. Did I just hear her right? She would NEVER love anyone again? Never? I don't know what screwed up calendar she's using, but forever's a pretty damn long time in my world.<p>

"Zig?" She asked, breaking my trance. I still just stared at her. I opened my mouth to speak, plead, beg her to change her mind, but no words came out.

"Zig!" She called again. Everyone in the Dot was still watching. I couldn't breathe.

"I…This seems sudden." I managed. Maya sighed. I gasped for air, suddenly being able to take a deep breath again.

"Zig, it's something I've thought long and hard about, and something I know I wanna do." She said softly.

"Maya…what about having a family? You've always wanted a family." I asked, hoping I'd make her change her mind about her new way of life.

"I don't know. Katie and Drew have three kids, and I have them."

"Three? Wow. I would never peg Drew as a Dad." I tried to change the subject, knowing the kids thing would make Maya wanna talk about Tori and I. The truth was that I knew Drew Torres better than anyone, he was my best friend. We'd met in my freshmen year, when I used to hang out at Maya's house with Tori and Tristan. Drew and Katie would be there too, and Drew and I had a lot in common. We hit it off, so to speak, and have been best friends ever since. I decided that letting Maya talk about Drew was better than her talking about Tori and me.

"Yeah, but he's really good with them. They have a ten year old, a six year old and a new born." Maya informed me, pulling up pictures on her iphone. I forced a smile, jealous of the kind of family Katie and Drew have. I've wanted a family like theirs all my life and never had one. My dad walked out when I was twelve, but even before that, he was never home. And when he was, he was drunk. Tori's behavior made me want to puke, and it was a painful reminder of my father. My mom said he looked just like me, but I refuse to believe it.

"Chris and Kick need a mom." I said, closing my eyes, trying to ignore the sudden lump in my throat. "They've never had one."

"They had Tori. Tori was an amazing person!" Maya protested. I shook my head.

"No, Maya. Tori fell apart after Tristan left to go into fashion and you left to live your high school dream." Zig complained. "You two held her together. And when high school fell apart, so did she."

"Playing in America for a musical wasn't my high school dream, Zig." Maya said. I raised an eyebrow. "My high school dream was you."

"Really?" I asked. She nodded and got back to our conversation about Tori.

"Zig, Tori gave birth to Chris and Kick. She's their mother." Maya said. I scoffed.

"Maya, my father and I share the same DNA and so does he and Weston, but that doesn't mean he's my dad." I shouted, a little louder and harsher than intended.

"Who the hell is Weston…?" Maya started to ask before it hit her. I closed my eyes even tighter and prayed to die right at that moment. "Wait…oh my gosh Zig. Was he your…?" She couldn't bring herself to say the words.

"My twin? Yeah, Wes was my twin brother. Died from kidney failure." I said, water forming behind my eyes. I fought it back with every ounce of energy in my body.

I'd told Maya about my twin brother, but I'd never once mentioned his name.

"Zig…" She started. I couldn't talk about this. I refused. My mom said Wes's death was why my father started drinking. But I don't blame my fragile brother. He'd fought until his last breath, and even then my little brother by two minutes couldn't make it. And my dad used it as an excuse to drink.

"Where are you staying?" I asked as Peter silently brought us our burgers. Maya bit into hers and swallowed, staring at me.

"Katie and Drew's…why?" She asked.

"Do you need a place to stay for a while, until you, um, get a place and stuff?" I rambled.

"What are you suggesting?" She asked, totally serious. I folded my napkin into a tiny little triangle, refusing to make eye contact.

"Well, you see, there's this basement apartment that we never rented out, and since you're staying with your sister, you might want your own place…" I rambled.

"Are you asking me to rent your basement?" She giggled. I blushed.

Damn my cheeks.

"Maybe," I admitted.

"I'd love that, Ziggy!" She smiled and laughed, a light little ring that went right through me.

"That'd be great, Maya. Really great." I said. She threw her arms around me in thanks and I had the erg to rip her clothes off and kiss her. Maya was the best person I'd ever met, and yet I couldn't have her because she didn't love me anymore. Life wasn't fair.

* * *

><p>*That Following Saturday*<p>

"Maya!" I called as Maya pulled up in front of my house in a light blue prius. I could see the back was stuffed with boxes. Chris slept in Tristan's arms and Kick rode his skateboard up and down the sidewalk of our quiet street.

Maya hopped out of her car and I took a good look at her for the first time since we'd reunited. She'd gotten taller, but was still shorter than me. She still had the same thin yet evenly proportioned frame, and her wavy blond hair now fell to the middle of her back. Her pink glasses rested on her nose, magnifying her hypnotizing blue eyes. She wore pale blue skinny jeans, a plaid button up shirt and converse. She had a grey bandana tied in her hair, pushing it back out of her face, as it hung down to her back. She was dazzling.

"Zig! I'm all ready to move in!" She laughed, walking over to me. I met her in the middle of my large front lawn. I'd chosen to wear a simple graphic t-shirt, a pair of old blue jeans and my vans. It was sunny and bright outside and the 76 degree air felt wonderful and refreshing on my face and arms. I could tell Maya felt the same way.

"Maya! This is great!" I smiled, hugging her. I inhaled her wonderful lavender sent before letting her go, wishing I could hold on forever.

"Maya darling!" Tristan called to her. She smiled and waved.

"Tristan! You look wonderful!" She said.

"Thanks, love. This is a little something from my fall collection." He said, spinning around for Maya. She clapped her hands and nodded in approval.

"Perfection!" She sang. I laughed and went to open Maya's trunk.

"You have lots of stuff." I commented playfully. She giggled and picked up a box marked RECORDS.

"Be super careful, Zig, these are my records. You know how hard it is to get vinyl now a days." She said. I laughed.

"Right." I mocked. She smirked and picked up one of the clothes boxes. After a few trips, her car was empty and my front lawn was full.

"Now we unpack?" I guessed.

"Now we paint." She said, holding up a can. I rolled my eyes.

"Maya, don't you know anything about me?" I questioned, guiding her toward my house. We walked through the foyer and into the kitchen.

"Here's your front door." I said, pointing to a white door that matched all the others. Her door was in the kitchen, right next to the one that lead to the garage. I put my hands around her eyes and led her down a flight of steps.

"Ta-da!" I sang, pulling my hands away. I flipped on the light switch and revealed the freshly painted apartment.

"Zig! This is wonderful!" She smiled, throwing her arms around me. I'd painted her apartment light blue, the color we'd discussed. I'd also had the wood floors refinished, so they looked new and modern.

"You didn't have to do this." She smiled. I laughed.

"You know I did." I replied. She looked around the apartment while I started bringing three or four boxes down at a time.

About two hours later, we'd moved in her furniture, all her boxes, and had unpacked everything. Tristan had taken Kick and Chris to dinner and then would take them to Adam's house to sleepover. Maya and I had eaten pizza for dinner.

"I'm so tired." Maya declared, falling onto her queen bed. I flopped down next to her.

"Me too." I said, turning my head to look at her. I grinned at her, my eyes filled with awe. She was so beautiful, every inch of her. And every spark that had been between us six years ago was just as strong now, if not stronger.

"What?" She asked me, grinning back at me. I moved a soft blond wave away from her face so I could see her beauty.

"Nothing. I'm just thinking about how happy I made you with this apartment." _And how much I love you and want to kiss every inch of you._

"You didn't have to paint, that was really nice." She smiled, giving me a friendly kiss on the cheek. I instantly wanted more, feeling as if I couldn't live without a kiss from her. I slowly moved so that I was on top of her.

"I want you, Maya." I murmured in her ear, nibbling on it. I could feel her jagged breathing beneath me.

"Zig," She'd started. I flipped us over, so she was on top of me, and stared into her eyes.

"Maya…" I murmured. She then bent down and kissed me, her lips moving hard against mine. I was taken by surprise, however I didn't hold back. I ran my hands up and down her body, familiarizing myself with it. When we were in high school and college, Maya and I had done all kinds of things. However, I got a new vibe from her, indicating that she was more experienced now.

And more experienced, she was.

She'd taken her time, slowly stripping her clothes off, teasing me. I smiled, laughing almost.

"Maya, hurry up!" I demand. She giggled and proceeded to straddle me on the bed. She slowly pulled off my shirt, examining my chest. In that moment, it was clear that she'd missed me as much as I missed her.

The rest of my night was a blur. All I could remember was her face, the way her eyes locked mine, the radiant smile…

I remember that it was slow and beautiful and wonderful and everything I'd ever want sex with Maya to be. I remember hearing my conscious screaming at me to be gentle and kind, even though I just wanted to tare into her.

Most of all, I remembered the infatuation, the passion. The desire for each other had been boiling under the surface for six years, waiting for the moment when we could unleash it on the other. Our kisses were filled with longing, need, practically leaking with passion. In that instant, I couldn't think of Tori. I couldn't think of my precious babies that were sleeping soundly in Adam's guest room. I couldn't think of what the next day would bring, or what had happened to get us to this moment. No, I could only think of the passion, the sparks soaring between us, igniting us in fiery flames. Maya had given in. Despite all of her emotions about love and hate and everything in between, she'd realized that I love her. I love her more than I'd ever loved Tori, more than I'd ever loved anyone.

And with every scream of pleasure, every kiss, every touch, I knew that right here, in her arms, was where I belonged.

* * *

><p>*Morning*<p>

Lone rays of light shone through the minuscule window in Maya's new bedroom, sending rainbows dancing off of mirrors and picture frames. I'd just opened my eyes, my mind already preparing to face another day of loneliness and anger at my deceased wife. However, I wasn't alone. And I was far from angry.

No, this feeling was different. This feeling was…powerful. I felt as if my heart was soaring through my chest, fluttering inside me. I was at ease, I was calm…I was in love all over again. Only this time, I'd fallen head first, and plummeted to the ground. I was so in love that I couldn't even begin to tell you how in love I really was.

Maya rolled over, causing her blanket to fall, exposing her perfect chest. I covered her again, knowing she'd want me to, and laid there, smiling at the ceiling.

"Zig?" She asked a bit later, her eyelids fluttering open to reveal that striking sea of blue.

"Maya, go back to sleep, sweetheart." I murmured, stroking her face. She smiled and sat up, pulling her blanket with her.

"Zig, last night was amazing." She giggled, getting up to put on underwear. I smiled, leaning my head back against the cool pillows.

"I know. I can't even describe the feeling I have right now." I told her, pulling on my jeans. She'd pulled on pajamas and was sitting on the floor, pulling on a pair of socks.

"Flings have that effect on people." Maya laughed, grinning at me. I stopped dead in my tracks.

"Flings?" I repeated, frowning at the sound of the word.

_No…no not again…she can't do this to me again… _

"Yeah. I mean, I guess you could call it a thank you present if you want." She winked at me. I couldn't breathe. You know that amazing feeling I had when I'd woken up just now? It's gone. It's dead. She killed it. My chest filled with cement.

"Ok…" I said carefully, not trusting myself to continue that sentence. I picked my t-shirt up off the ground and examined it. It was white and had stains from when Chris was a baby. The shirt was pretty gross and had puke stains, milk stains, mashed up carrot and pea baby food stains…I guess I hadn't worn this one in a while. It brought back painful memories of the first week I brought Chris and Tori home from the hospital.

I slipped it over my head and grabbed my sneakers. Maya was sitting on her bed in her bra and shorts, smiling at me.

"I'll see you soon, Zig." She said. I just nodded and walked up the stairs into my kitchen.

"Zig! Why were you down there?" My best friend, Drew Torres asked me. He was standing in my kitchen, cooking eggs in a pan on the stove. I saw Kick drawing in a sketchbook on the table and Chris sat in his highchair, playing with his applesauce.

"Daddy! Look what I draw!" Kick said, calling me over to him. I ignored the lump in my throat and went to kneel down next to my son. My perfect son. He was so innocent, so kind, so much like me. Yet he never spoke of his mother anymore, and when he did, he cried. Tori and he hadn't had a real conversation in over three weeks before the accident. It pained me to think that he never got to talk to her again. But the truth was that I think he was afraid of her.

I knelt down next to him and looked at his sketch pad. It was a portrait of Maya, and a rather impressive one for a six year old. I took his pink colored pencil out of his chubby hand.

"That's great, Kick!" I said. "But, let's add some more color to Maya's face." I said, showing him how to shade. He took the pencil and I put my hand on his, guiding his strokes. He smiled once we'd turned her cheeks to a rose color.

"She's pretty, Daddy." Kick said. I sighed, and looked at him. A tiny, young copy of me stared back.

"Yeah, she is Kick. She really is." I said, planting a big kiss on his forehead.

"Keep this." He said, ripping it out and handing it to me. Then he started to sketch his brother.

"Dadda!" Chris yelled, realizing I was there after loosing interest in the applesauce.

"Hey Chris!" I said, keeping up my poker face and walking over by him. He reached out for me, but I hesitated.

"Actually, daddy has to go work." I lied. I was lying to my two year old son. This is not good, very not good.

"See you soon?" He asked. I nodded and kissed his forehead.

"Soon." I promised. Drew gave me a look as I grabbed a piece of bacon and walked toward the foyer to go upstairs.

I took a quick shower and changed into my painting clothes which consisted of old blue jeans with thousands of paint splatters, a white t-shirt with paint on it, and bare feet. I marched up the attic steps to the third floor attic and slammed the door behind me. I went over to my stereo and blasted the first thing that was on. It was Justin Beiber. I made a face, but ignored the awful music that blasted into my ears.

My attic is old and long. It had wooden floors, white walls and a few small windows. There's one long room that's my studio. On one wall there are built in shelves and storage cabinets. On the mirroring wall are pictures I've painted, pictures of my friends and family, and posters of bands I like and have gone to see with Drew.

I rip into one of my cabinets and pulled out a large piece of canvas, placing it on my easel and then opening up a box of acrylic paint. I grabbed a random paint brush out of a jar full of them that sat on a shelve and mixed a skin tone colored paint on my pallet.

Making swift, light strokes I began to paint the sketch Kick had drawn. After a furious amount of painting, a redbull and a few Justin Beiber songs, there was a knock on the door. Someone was interrupting my personal time.

"What?" I yelled over the music. Drew swung the door open and closed it behind him, coming into my studio. He hit the pause button on my stereo and came over to me.

"Dude, what's wrong?" he asked. I kept making violent, hard lines with my paint brush.

"What makes you think there's something wrong?" I spit.

"Maybe it was the dark cloud of depression that followed you into the kitchen, maybe it was the fact that you've listened to Justin Beiber for the past forty five minutes. I'm worried, Zig." He said. I placed my pallet and paintbrush down on a small table next to my easel and sighed.

"Sorry, I didn't feel like looking for a music station."

"That's not what I'm asking."

"Drew…I slept with Maya last night." I said. He raised a eyebrow, then smiled.

"Dude! Finally! You've been in love with her for years! Was she good?" he asked. I gave him a disgusted look, but nodded.

"Yeah, she's perfect. Problem is, that "hook up" last night meant nothing to her."

"Tough break." Drew commented.

"Look, Drew, you're married! How'd you get Katie to fall for you?"

"Uh…I kinda was myself." He replied.

"Yes, yes, but still! You're so lucky! You're a sports broadcaster! I'm a sketch artist! Girls like rich sports broadcasters, not single father artists!" I said. Drew came over to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah, they do. But you're forgetting something." He said. I glanced up at my best friend.

"What's that?" I mumbled.

"Girls may dig rich guys…but Maya digs you. She always has, Zig."

"What do you mean, always has?" I asked.

"Are you kidding me? When you first started Degrassi, I'd go over to Katie's house everyday. And Maya would always be there, playing depressing songs on the cello or the guitar or the piano. I'd ask what was wrong and she'd tell me that she was in love with you. And you broke her heart."

"Tori and I were a stupid couple! We didn't belong together." I said. "I really hurt Maya that bad?"

"You killed her, Zig."

"And after she left me to go play music?" I whispered.

"She told Katie that she was giving up love forever because you were the only man for her." Drew said. I actually felt my chest fill with cement for the second time that day.

"Shit." I mumbled.

"Zig, calm down. You'll find someone else." He said. I walked away from him and went over to the far wall, and peered out the window. Across the street, my neighbors were playing with their kids on their front lawn.

"Is Kick ever gonna be okay?" I asked. "With Tori gone, I mean?"

"Zig…"

"Drew, what if he hates me? He told Maya that I loved her! What if he thinks that I never loved Tori?"

"You never did love Tori." Drew reminded me.

"Drew, he can't know that!"

"How many times did you sleep with Tori during your marriage?" Drew asked me. I sighed in discust.

"Eight times." I replied.

"Eight times in six years? Dude! Me and Katie do it four times a week!" he laughed.

"Drew, don't forget you and Katie are meant for each other! Tori was a mistake…I'm afraid Kick is gonna think he was a mistake."

"He was." Drew said.

"Yeah! But he's the worlds freaking best mistake!" I shouted. "That little boy is the reason I haven't gone crazy! I can't go crazy and leave him here! He's my only hope." I said. Drew sighed.

"Dude, go back to painting. I'll take care of Kick and Chris. Just chill, okay?" He asked, his voice filled with concern. I slumped against the window.

"Turn back on my Justin Beiber." I said. He laughed.

"I'll turn on anything else." He said, putting my ipod on shuffle instead of using my radio. I couldn't help but smile. But only for a second, because I felt myself sinking into a deep depression.

* * *

><p>*Night time*<p>

I was in my bed, which was just another painful reminder of last night. I'd painted for six hours, hadn't eaten anything, and then came to lie down for the rest of the night. I was depressed about Tori. I was depressed about Maya. I was depressed about everything.

"Daddy?" I heard Kick's small voice ask softly. He was standing in my doorway, carrying a tray.

"C'mon up here, Kick." I sat, tapping my bedspread. He walked over slowly and placed the tray carefully on my night stand. Then I picked him up. He crawled under the covers with me and I held him in my arms.

"Drew left." He said. I was suddenly alarmed.

"What? Where's Chris?" I asked.

"Maya put him to bed." He said. I sighed and glanced at the clock. It was nine o'clock.

"Okay good." I said.

"I brought you dinner." He said. "Drew told us you were sick."

"Thanks little buddy." I said, bringing up the tray and setting it on my lap. There was a plate with a messy PB&J sandwich on it. There was a bag of potato chips and a Diet Coke next to it. Then I noticed the cupcake that was placed on a napkin, next to the plate.

"Drew made cupcakes?" I asked. Drew doesn't even know how to use a mixer.

"No, Maya did! And she let Chris and I frost them!" He said, smiling. I kissed his forehead.

"That's cool, buddy." I said. He smiled.

"I made the peanut butter and jelly all by myself."

"And it looks great." I smiled, cutting it in half. "Want some?" he nodded and took half. I bit into it and smiled slightly while I chewed.

"Yummy." I told him. He was so cute.

"Thanks daddy." He said. We finished our food and I placed the tray on the ground. We'd shared the cupcake, and it was good. I recognized it. Maya used to make them for me all the time because the red velvet was my favorite. She'd surprised me on Valentine's Day in our senior year by making me a huge cupcake…I pushed the memory of that night away.

"I want you to feel better daddy." He said.

"Kick-" I started, but he cut me off.

"No. There's no choice. You have to feel better. I may only be six, but I know you're sad about mommy." He said. "Daddy, you can't go away and hide. We want you to feel better. Please daddy. Don't go away like Mommy." He said, tears now rolling down his cheeks. I grabbed a tissue and wiped them away.

"Don't cry." I murmured. "I'll never be mommy. Mommy was mean to you guys…I'll always love you. And I'll be better soon. Tomorrow." I promised. He smiled.

"Good." He yawned. Then he fell asleep in my arms. I snuggled up with him, and drifted to sleep. I had to get over my stupid love problems. This wasn't high school. This is real life, and if I'm bringing my sons down, I need to knock it off. I just hope I can.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Please review and tell me what you think! I wrote this really late last night, so it's not my best writing, but I tried. :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**OMG i hate myself for not updating, I've been so busy writing other stories! Check out my other Zaya stories, I'm adding some new ones and I added a new on called How It's Always Been. go ZAYA fans! 3 Alright, enough of my chatting. I must be boring you, dear readers. Without further adue, CHAPTER 4!**

**i don't own degrassi or Zaya.**

* * *

><p>I'd gotten out of bed at five thirty because it was Monday and I'd have to get to work. I took a quick shower and tucked Kick into his own bed before heading downstairs at six o'clock. I'd heard guitar and opened my front door, looking for the source of the music. And sure enough, Maya was sitting on the hammock on my huge wrap-around front porch, playing guitar and singing her heart out.<p>

The air was cool and the sun had just come up. They way the breeze blew her hair behind her shoulders and out of her face, she looked like an angel. Or a super model. But I was trying to avoid super models right now because of Tori, so I went with the whole angel thing.

I mentally scolded myself for thinking these thoughts. Maya hadn't noticed me come outside and kept playing, so I stood in the doorway and listened.

"_Some people are down and out, _

_Some people are lonely now, _

_Some people just need a vacation. _

_Some people can't find a smile, _

_For some people it's been a while since _

_They've had an all night conversation. _

_But since you walked into my life, _

_Everything's seemed so right._

_The sun's been shining_

_And I've been singing_

_This song in my head_

_And it goes la la la la la la la la_

_Nothin but blue skies_

_When I stare into your eyes_

_I get tongue tied every time you smile_

_Some people don't know what love can do_

_Well they should see me with you_

_I remember how it used to be_

_I remember how I used to dream_

_For someone to come along and sweep me off my feet_

_Some people say wishes don't come true,_

_Well I say some wishes do_

_The sun's been shining_

_And I've been singing_

_This song in my head _

_And it goes la la la la la la la la_

_Nothin but blue skies_

_When I stare into your eyes_

_I get tongue tied every time you smile_

_Some people don't know what love can do,_

_Some people don't know what love can do._

_Well they should see me with you._

_And when they _

_Look at us_

_They can tell_

_We're in love_

_Oh it's so obvious_

_The sun's been shining,_

_And I've been singing_

_This song in my head_

_And it goes la la la la la la la la_

_Nothing but blue skies, _

_When I stare into your eyes_

_I get tongue tied every time you smile_

_Some people don't know what love can do, _

_Some people don't know what love can do_

_Well they should see me with you."_ Maya sang this whole song by Jenette McCurdy. I started clapping, and she looked over to see me.

She giggled. "Thanks Zig. I know Jenette McCurdy is bad, but I love that song." She said.

"I think it was nice." I said. Jenette McCurdy wasn't bad…but she wasn't known for her music. At least, not by people my age. However I couldn't help wonder is Maya had sang that song because of me.

I walked over to her and sat down. She placed her guitar in the case and we both sat there for a while.

"It's so nice here." She commented, smiling out at my quiet neighborhood.

"Yeah…when we were kids, Wes and I used to ride our bikes to this neighborhood. We had a friend that lived down the street and would always pass this house on the way there. Anyway, Wes loved this house. He'd always say that he wanted to live here when he was older and got married. He was seven then. And he died when he was eleven." I said. Maya nodded her head.

"My mom was a star soccer athlete in high school. She was the caption of her team, she was the school president, she was doing six hours of workouts and drills a day…she was Katie. She was on the national team, and tons of colleges were recruiting her. She had a full scholarship. And when she got sick…she lost everything she'd ever worked for. Just like when Katie got injured, she lost her spot on the national team. She's doing great now, writing for Sports Illustrated, but I know that she misses the game." Maya said, her voice cracking when she talked about her mom.

Tears started to run down her cheeks. And before I knew it, talking about my brother made me cry too. So there we both sat, crying our eyes out. Maya leaned on my shoulder and I put my arms around her. She wrapped her arms back around me, and we sat there like that, just comforting each other.

"Daddy? Maya?" a sleepy Kick asked, opening up the heavy oak front door and peeking outside. He was wearing his racecar pajamas and his Spongebob slippers and his hair was messy. He was so cute. Maya and I quickly wiped our eyes dry and I got up.

"Hey little buddy, what's going on?" I asked, picking him up and bringing him to sit with Maya and me.

"I woke up in my room and I thought I fell asleep in yours." He said groggily, leaning his face into my chest and snuggling up on my lap. Maya was beaming at him. I always knew she wanted kids. I just wish she could've been Kick and Chris's mom instead of Tori. We'd all be so much happier. And Tori would probably still be alive.

"I moved you into your room this morning." I said, stroking his face.

"Oh ok." He mumbled. I could tell he was ready to fall back asleep.

"C'mon Kick, you're back at school today." I said, making him sit up.

"No!" he said. Today was supposed to be his first day back at school and my first day back at work.

"C'mon, Kick! You have to get ready soon or I'll be late for work." I said, my voice slow, persuasive, soft. However, he would have none of this.

"No!" he cried. I slumped back in the chair and decided to try a different approach.

"Fine." I said, getting up and walking inside the house. I stepped into the kitchen and stood by the window, so I could hear everything being said. I cracked the window and listened. I knew that Kick liked to talk to Maya, and he loved her, so maybe he'd listen to her.

Maya moved closer to Kick.

"Do you wanna talk to me?" she asked him. He nodded and climbed into her lap.

"Mommy used to get me from school during lunch and take me to work." He said. "And then daddy would come to mommy's work and get mad and start yelling. And then he'd take me out to lunch and we'd go home and draw." Kick said. I closed my eyes and remembered this.

Tori would get drunk at work, somehow drive to Kick's school, take him without telling the teacher and then take him back to work. I'd get a call from the school telling me my son was abducted, so I'd run over to the modeling agency, looking for Tori. And I'd find her doing a photo shoot or a commercial, drunk, and Kick would always be standing on the side crying for her. I'd grab him, make sure he was okay, and tell Tori off. Then we'd go get a burger or something, and then I'd take him home. He'd color in a sketch book while I'd finish work from home in my office. I suddenly wondered if Kick was afraid that Tori would be at his school.

"Kick, don't worry. Daddy wouldn't send you somewhere that wasn't safe."

"Well he kept doing it." Kick said. "Everyday, he'd send me. And at least twice a week, I'd go with mommy." He said. Maya hugged him closer.

"Mommy can't hurt you anymore, Kick." She murmured.

"Why?"

"Because I would never let her hurt you. And I will promise that your daddy would never let you get hurt either." She said, stroking his face.

"I don't care. I'm not going."

"Kick, please go. I want you to go." Maya said. He looked frustrated.

"Will you be my mommy?" he asked.

"What?' Maya asked, clearly dumbfounded by this question. I almost fell over.

"Will you be my new mommy?" he asked again.

"Kick I-" She started.

"No! Please be my new mommy." He said. "I know you love daddy. And mommies and daddies should love each other." He said. "My friends' mommies and daddies love each other."

"Your daddy doesn't love me, Kick. Not like that." She said.

"Yes he does."

"Kick-"

"Maya, daddy always tells Peter about you." Kick said. I almost fell over after hearing this.

"What?" Maya questioned.

"Daddy tells all his friends that he loves 'Maya'."

"Really?" She asked. I bit my lip.

"Yeah. Everyone except Tristan." Kick said. I almost died. I hadn't told Tristan because Tristan was like the CNN of Tori's life.

* * *

><p>Maya POV:<p>

Zig really told all his friends that he loved me? Surely Kick was confused. Zig didn't love me…if he did, he would've followed me…right? Uh! Maybe moving in with him was a bad idea.

"I'm not your mommy, Kick."

"But you could be!" He said. "Please." He added. I considered this.

"Alright. But no one tells daddy." I made him promise. But he didn't. Instead he ran into the house.

"Daddy! Daddy!" Kick yelled. I sighed and followed him.

Zig was in the kitchen, putting toast in the toaster.

"Hey little buddy."

"Daddy! I have a mommy!" Kick squealed with excitement.

"What?" he laughed, kneeling down so they were eye level with each other. I stood in the archway and shook my head. Zig looked at me, then smiled at his son.

"Maya's my mommy!" He sang, jumping up and down.

"Ok?" Zig asked. Something told me it wasn't meant to be a question.

"Yeah! She's my new mommy!" he said. I bit my lip, not knowing how Zig would react to this.

"That's great." Zig smiled, ruffling Kick's hair. "Now get ready for school."

"No!" Kick cried. I stepped in.

"Kick, I'll get you ready for school. Go upstairs and pick out some clothes." I said. He smiled.

"Okay mommy!" he said, hugging my leg. Then he ran up the steps.

"Mommy, huh?" Zig asked, standing up.

"I'm sorry Zig." I apologized, pouring a cup of coffee.

"Don't worry about it." He said, touching my arm. His gentle touch sent electricity through my body.

"Tori would roll over in her grave." I sighed, closing my eyes. His gentle voice made me open my eyes again.

"Look, Kick needs a mom. And when we were dating, I'd always thought that you'd be an amazing mom to our kids…of course I also thought that we'd get married someday." Zig told me.

"Oh Ziggy," I sighed, stroking his face. "I've missed you."

"I needed you, Maya." He said. "I needed you more than anything in the world and you didn't come back."

"You got together with Tori," I said, leaning my head down. I leaned against the island as did he.

"No! You left me for California, I went to a party and took too many shots and Tori tricked me into bed with her." he said, looking deeply into my eyes. "I never got over you Maya."

"I never got over you either, Zig. I loved you so much. And once I'd gotten that job, I didn't want to go." I told him.

"Why did you go?" he asked me suddenly.

"I was sure that you'd come after me." I said. He moved his face close to me, so that our noses were touching.

"I wish I came after you. I was young and stupid. All I knew was that you left and a month later, Tori was pregnant with my child and I needed to be there for them."

"Zig…it's not too late."

"Maya, you said it yourself, you don't want to be in love." He told me.

"Oh Ziggy, you're worth the risk." I promised, my voice full of urgency. He leaned in to kiss me.

"Tell me if you want me to stop." He whispered softly, his breath hot against my face.

"Just kiss me." I returned breathlessly. He leaned in, his perfect lips coming closer to mine. For a second, I saw that look in his eyes. That look he used to give me every time we kissed. That look that came into his dazzling green eyes, making me weak at the knees.

We were almost there. His lower lip was just about to touch my upper.

"Daddy?" We heard. He stopped dead in his tracks, bit his lip in frustration, and closed his eyes.

"Yes Kick?" Zig called.

"I spilled toothpaste on the floor!" he yelled back, his voice echoing on the walls of the washroom and traveling down the staircase.

"Coming!" Zig yelled back, looking into my eyes. "I'll be back." He said. "Don't move Maya!" he yelled as he ran up the stairs. Was Zig just about to kiss me? Was I just about to kiss Zig? Zig had broken my heart, I couldn't let him get his grip on it again, so he could tear it out of my chest. But I'd broken his heart too, maybe we deserved another shot at being together…

And then the crying of his two year old son started. I sighed and followed Zig up the stairs. Once I got to the top, I realized how big his house really was.

I'd never really toured his house before, if you know what I mean. I'd only really seen the kitchen (since the apartment doesn't have a kitchen) and his first floor washroom.

Well, the upstairs was huge. The big staircase led into a spacious, extensive hallway with almost half a dozen doors.

The first door on the left was a huge washroom, and the door was open, exposing Zig and Kick standing at the double sink, trying to scrub toothpaste off the counter, floor and walls.

The first door to the right was an office. It had very modern, expensive furnishings. There was a large book case that didn't hold books, but different bottles of liquor, beer and wine, as well as fancy glasses for all of these beverages. This little detail let me know that it was Tori's. Light pink walls and pictures of different magazines with Tori on the cover was the second clue.

The second door to the right was Kick's room. I could tell from the twin bed with racecar sheets, skateboard, and art supplies every where. The walls were your classic little boy dark blue and the room sported a fuzzy carpet that looked as soft as clouds.

The next door on the left was another office. I peeked inside, and instantly knew it was Zig's. There were comic strips framed and hung on the neutral walls. There was a wooden desk, but it was pushed in the corner, out of the way. No, the focal point of the room wasn't the desk, but the gigantic easel in the center that held a huge sketch pad. There were colored pencils, markers of all sorts, and crayons all sorted by color and medium in many different drawers in a series of built in cabinets.

Next was a closed door, which I assumed led to the attic that Zig had described.

At the end of the hall was what I assumed was Zig and Tori's bedroom. The door was closed, so I couldn't tell. But across from the attic door was where the crying was coming from. I inaudibly walked into the room and saw it was Chris's. He was lying manically in the toddler bed, crying his eyes out. I went over to him and spoke soothing words to him, all while rubbing his belly. He rapidly calmed down, and looked over at me serenely.

"Shhh, don't cry little one. Everything's alright. I'm here now." I whispered. He smiled and reached out for me. I took him into my arms and slowly moved around the room with him, vigilantly cradling his fragile body in my loving arms, and singing a soft lullaby. He smiled up at me, his curly dark hair and dark eyes reminded me of my best friend. I fought the tears that came to my eyes, afraid they'd upset him further.

"You're a good mom, Maya." Zig said, breaking the lullaby. I turned around to see him leaning in the door's frame, smiling at me. I blushed, for I wasn't used to a compliment like that.

"I'm not a mom." I said, looking away so he wouldn't see my rosey cheeks.

"It's a shame…you'd be an amazing one." Zig said. I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my lips. I heard him chuckle softly.

"Thanks, Zig."

"Don't mention it." He shrugged, and then smiled again. "Kick is cleaned up, he's attempting getting dressed. I have to get to work soon…can you help him?"

"Yeah!" I smiled. "But he doesn't wanna go to school."

"Can't blame him after what Tori used to do…it was her way of trying to get close to him, I guess. Anyway, I think he needs a few more days, this was a real trauma for him." Zig said.

"I totally agree."

"I can't leave him at daycare with Chris, so I'm gonna try and drop him off at my mom's house." Zig said. "When she's too busy to take care of him, I'll bring him to the office with me." Zig said, and this made him look frustrated and worried.

"Do you have a meeting today?" I guessed.

"How'd you know?" he asked, chuckling a bit.

"I just know. You always get that look when you have a presentation to do or something." I told him.

"I have to introduce some new characters to the writers today…wish me luck." He sighed.

"So what's Kick gonna do while you're in that fun meeting?" I laughed. He shrugged.

"Is it a bad idea to leave him with my intern?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"That's not the best idea you've ever had." I agreed. Then an idea of my own hit me. "Zig, I only teach three periods. I can take Kick to Degrassi with me." I offered.

"Maya, you don't have to." he protested, even though the look in his face was full of relief.

"Zig, don't worry about it." I said. He sighed in relief.

"Thanks Maya." He said. "I'm gonna go get ready for work, then I'll get Chris ready for daycare."

"Alright. I'll help Kick." I told him. He smiled and then walked quickly down the hallway and into his bedroom.

"C'mon Chris." I said.

I changed him into a t-shirt, a sweatshirt, and a pair of cargo shorts. I slid his Spiderman sneakers on and fastened the velcro strips securely. I carried him into Kick's room where I placed him on the floor, in a safe place. He started to play with one of Kick's plastic racecars.

"Kick!" I laughed, seeing that he'd dressed himself in a bathing suite and dress shirt. I undressed him and helped him put on jeans, a clean cotton t-shirt and his sneakers.

"Mommy, you're still in pajamas!" Kick giggled. I laughed too and picked up Chris.

"Well, c'mon then! Let's go to my house." I said. He followed me down the steps to my apartment. I placed Chris on the couch and instructed Kick to watch him. I'd taken a shower before I'd gone outside to play guitar, so I was clean.

I chose to wear a light pink dress shirt with a medium length black dress skirt. I chose my black leather heels and a sliver necklace with a pink heart shaped pendant. I pulled my side bangs into a hairclip in the back of my head and pulled on my cropped black blazer.

I walked out of my bedroom to find Kick and Chris exactly where I'd left them. I collected Chris in my arms once again, and led Kick up the stairs into the kitchen.

I placed Chris in his chair and Kick climbed into his favorite seat at the kitchen table. I opened up the fridge and started to crack eggs into a pan on the stove. I threw some English muffins into the toaster.

"Mommy, Chris needs his applesauce." Kick informed me. I got the glass jar out of the big fridge and scooped some into a bowl like Drew had shown me. I placed it in front of Chris and he giggled while he started to eat it.

I remembered my eggs and realized they were perfect, so I turned off the gas on the stove and put some scrambled eggs onto a plate for Zig, Kick and I. I also gave everyone an English muffin and placed the plates at the table. Kick and I were starting to eat just as Zig came barreling down the steps wearing a graphic t-shirt, a suit jacket, and a pair of jeans.

"Wow, Maya you made breakfast?" Zig asked. He sounded impressed.

"I did. I noticed that you only feed these kids when Drew's around." I joked. He laughed and sat down.

"Thanks, Maya. You're such a big help."

"No worried, I'm happy to help. Besides," I said, taking a sip of coffee. "I kinda a mom now." I said, winking at Kick. He smiled.

"Yay!" he sang. Zig grinned at me as we ate. I could tell he wanted to pick up where we'd left off this morning, but now was hardly the time for a make out session. Besides, I didn't even know if I wanted to put my heart out there again…he's already broken it twice.

"Maya, I've gotta get to work." Zig said at seven thirty.

"Yeah, me too. I'll see you later?" I asked. He smiled as he threw his dishes into the sink.

"Yeah! Maybe we can go out for dinner tonight, I think Tristan's free to baby-sit." Zig said. I smiled.

"I'd love that." I promised. He beamed.

"Great, it's a date." He said, picking Chris up as well as his briefcase. "Bye Kick! Bye Maya!" he called as he made his way out the door to his Hyundai.

"Let's go, Kick." I said, clearing the dishes from the table and grabbing my purse. I zipped him into his jacket and we made our way to my car. I buckled him into the spare car seat Zig had left for me on the front porch and locked the front door.

"Ready Mommy?" Kick asked excitedly. I smiled.

"Yes. Degrassi, here we come." I said, pulling out onto the quiet street.

* * *

><p>*At Degrassi*<p>

"C'mon Kick." I said, taking his hand and leading him up the front steps of the school. A senior boy saw me and whistled. I rolled my eyes, amused by this. When I was a student here, I was a quiet looser. Now I was apparently the hot new teacher.

The hallways were filled with new faces that were foreign to me, but everything else was the same. It was a challenge getting Kick through the hallway without him getting trampled, so I was relieved when I saw Simpson wave me into his office.

"Mr. Simpson!" I said happily greeting my old principal, now boss.

"Ms. Matlin…you have a child with you."

"I'm Kick, I'm six and this is my mommy." Kick told Simpson as we walked into the office.

"He's Zig Novak and Tori Santamarina's son…Tori died a week ago." I said. Simpson looked upset by the news.

"They were married?"

"Yes, they had two children. Kick and a two year old, Chris." I said. He considered this.

"So why is he here?"

"He's having some issues dealing with the whole…death thing and couldn't go back to school yet. I'm renting the apartment in Zig's basement from him, and I'm helping out with the kids. Zig had to work, so Kick is with me." I explained. He nodded.

"And this won't be an everyday occurrence?" he asked.

"A week tops." I clarified. He sighed in defeat.

"Fine. But keep him out of trouble."

"Yes sir, Principal Simpson." I said, smiling. Then I took Kick's hand and we walked to the music room to set up for my first class, the niners. I'd have them period two. The irony of teaching the grade nine music class where Tori and I had met was painfully funny. I just hoped I'd be able to live up to the standards Ms. Oh had set up, because she was an amazing teacher and musician.

* * *

><p><strong>an: thoughts? Questions? Concerns? I have already added ch. 5 to the document manager, I'll update tomorrow! Just review and let me know if you want me to even bother posting ch. 5, i really don't know who is reading anymore. As always, this was dedicated to 2526 :)**


	5. Chapter 5

_I'm counting the days since I began to live without you. I'm covered in rain, but it feels just like it's the sun. _

_You're stuck in a world of make-believe, you're so conceited. I gave you a chance; you must be crazy not to leave. You're never gonna bring me down, don't come around. It's funny how now I'm on a roll without you._

_I'm better off without you._

_I'm doing better off without you._

_Hey I'm screaming at you._

_Hey I don't care enough to write you a letter, no that I'm doing better, better off without you!_

"Zig!" my coworker AJ said, coming into my office. My office was big and airy. It had big glass windows that went from the ceiling to the floor. It had wood floors and modern furniture. My desk was in the middle, but I had easels of all kinds around the room, propped up against walls, book cases, anything. Next to my desk was a door that lead into a huge closet that held every art medium you could ever imagine, all organized in neat little clear draws with different colorful patterns decorating them. In the corner of my office, by the windows, there was a low, modern leather couch and a couple of bean bag chairs, complete with a lava lamp and a fuzzy rug. Tori had hated the style, declaring that it was, and I quote, "too 1980s for you, Ziggy-pie. You could never pull that off, sweetheart!" unquote. Yeah, my wife was _wonderful_. Not.

I'd been sitting at my desk, sketching Henry when AJ had interrupted me.

"AJ! Hey, how are things?" I asked, getting up to shake my friend's hand. He slumped down in my beanbag chair and took a coke out of my mini fridge.

"I have to talk to you." he informed me. I closed my office door and hit the button on my desk phone.

"Brenda, I'm in a meeting. No calls or visits, please." I informed my assistant. Her adolescent, preppy voice shot back a "sure thing Mr. Novak!" and I hung up the phone. I could see that things with AJ were unwell, so I carefully selected a thin paintbrush from a jar of them that sat on my desk and started on the portrait of Maya again, adding detail now.

"What's up, AJ? You seem down." I asked, focusing on getting the lighter blue streaks in Maya's eyes perfect. It was a close up of her face, so the eyes were the focal point.

"Well…it's not actually concerning me." he said. I looked over at my friend and raised an eyebrow. AJ was a somewhat overweight guy, with dark hair and bushy eyebrows. He was also gay. He pushed his thick black bifocals further up his nose and continued, clearing his throat.

"It's about you, Zig." He said. I almost messed up the line I was illustrating because of my shock. Almost, but I saved it with a quick jolt of the wrist.

"Excuse me?" I asked, rotating toward him. He shifted uncomfortably.

"Well, Alex and I were talking…" he started. Alex was a friend of Tori's. A model we sometimes used to test outfits and designs on. You see, Harry and Henry was a show using real actors, but had little animations of the people that were like a conscious for the characters. So Alex would help us make sure the real life outfits looked good on paper.

"And?" I asked, my voice angrier than intended. I took a deep breath and asked in a calm voice, "What is it, AJ?"

"Uh! I can not do this!" he declared, standing up.

"Dude, please tell me." I said. He sighed and crossed his arms the way Tristan did.

"Zig, we're worried. Worried that you're disheartened."

"Me? Depressed? I'm not Eli, AJ." I said, talking about my old friend from Degrassi. AJ hadn't gone to Degrassi, but had met Eli a few months ago at the Christmas party Tori insisted on having.

"Zig, you haven't been coming into work! I haven't seen any recent sketches of Kick or Chris. And you've been wearing jeans with dress jackets…" he started, looking my outfit up and down.

"I wear jeans and jackets all the time." I said because this was very true. Jeans with a cool t-shirt and a nice jacket was normal clothing for me to wear to work.

"Exactly." He said. I rolled my eyes. "Andrew also told me that you've been listening to Justin Beiber? He's MINE Zig, all mine." AJ declared. I was very confused.

"AJ, that's creepy and wrong, mostly because Justin Beiber's seventeen. And it's Drew, not Andrew." I said. AJ shrugged.

"Yes, but that hair! And those eyes…" he started to daydream, which freaked me out.

"Getting off topic!" I said loudly. He shook his head and look at me.

"Sorry Zig. But really, I'm concerned. You should at least stop drawing random blond girls." AJ said, motioning toward my painting.

"AJ, that's Maya." I said dumbly. He laughed.

"The girl who broke your heart in college? Tori's best friend? The blond? _She's_ the renowned Maya?" he asked. I shrugged.

"How did you know all that stuff?" I questioned.

"Tristan and I talk." He said, grinning to himself. "I pictured her as a ginger…and prettier." He said, seeming truly bewildered.

"Dude, if you ever say that again, I will pound your face in." I threatened, taking a step toward him and clenching my fist. He stepped back and laughed.

"Okay, okay. Have fun here…but please don't be sad Zig, Henry and Harry need you." he said.

"Okay, I promise." I said to get him out of my hair. He closed my office door and I sat back down at my desk and stared over at my painting. I wondered if Maya's first day was any better than mine…

Maya POV:

It was a new school year at Degrassi! The niners shuffled into my classroom, and all took their seats. Kick was sitting on the floor, next to my desk, drawing in his sketch pad. He really was talented, just like Zig. Speaking of Zig, I wondered how he was doing…

"Miss. Matlin?" asked a tall girl with tan skin and dark, curly hair. She looked like Tori. She even had the same huge eyes.

"Yes Tori?" I asked with out thinking.

"Um, my name is Maxine." She said. My eyes widened as I realized I'd called her Tori.

"Sorry, I confused you with someone else." I said. "What can I do for you Maxine?"

"Why is there a kid?" she asked. I hesitated.

"He's here because I need to take care of him." I said awkwardly, not really knowing what else to say.

"Miss Matlin, a word?" Simpson asked, poking his head in the door of my classroom. I hesitated again, unsure of what to do to leave my class.

"Class, get your instruments. There's a sign up sheet on my desk. Pass it around and sign your name next to whatever instrument you want." I said, handing the student closest to me the clipboard and pencil. Kick followed me into the hallway.

"Yes Mr. Simpson?" I asked.

"Maya…I don't want you to be encouraging single parenting."

"I'm not a single parent." I fought, unsure of where he was going with this.

"You're right, you're not. A school board member saw you bring a child into the building, and complained that you were setting a bad example." He explained.

"SO?" I asked. I was egar to get back to my class.

"SO you need to tell them you're married." He said. "To Zig Novak."

"What? Why?" I demanded, angry.

"Because if you want to keep your job, you'll be married for the sake of the children." He said.

"Mr. Simpson…" I started, but he cut me off.

"Go tell them you and Zig are married, end of discussion. You can't keep this job if you insist on not being married. Your choice." He said. "Happy teaching." Then he turned and walked away, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open. Kick shrugged at me, and I picked him up, carrying him into the classroom and shutting the door behind me.

"You all got your instruments?" I asked hopefully. Everyone nodded except two girls in the back: Maxine and a blond who were both clutching the same violin.

"Girls, what seems to be the problem?" I asked, setting Kick down back in his spot on the floor.

"She took the violin!" Maxine shrieked. The blond sighed.

"Oh c'mon, Max, you know that I've been playing since I was in first grade." The blond replied. She strangely reminded me of myself.

"Guys chill." I said, taking the violin. "What's your name?" I asked the blond.

"Lexie." She replied, smiling at me. I sighed; she even had similar glasses as me.

"Okay, Lexie and Maxine. Tell you what. Why don't you, Lexie, try the cello? I played violin for many years too, but learned cello in grade 8 and loved it. Try it, you will too." I assured. I pulled the cello out of the closet and handed her the huge case.

"I'll try it, sure. Thanks Miss Matlin." She said. I saw Simpson watching me from the window in my door and turned to the class.

"Alright class, let me clear something up. My name is Maya Matlin…" I hesitated. Was this really what I wanted? Well, I really didn't have an option, and I could tell already that I'd love this job. "Novak. Maya Matlin Novak. I got married when I was," I hadn't thought this through. "20 years old. My husband and I have two wonderful children. My husband, Zig, is a graphic designer for a popular TV show. I go by Matlin because I want to carry on my family name since I have no brothers to do that. Any questions? Ask me anything." I said. A few hands shot up. I sighed, however Simpson shot me a smile and then walked away again, leaving for real this time.

"IS it true you went to Julliard?" Maxine asked. I blushed.

"Yeah, I did. Graduated top of my class." I said, not trying to brag.

"Can we see a picture of your husband?" Lexie asked. I sighed and tried to think of something. I snapped my fingers and pulled a yearbook off the shelf in the back, opening it to the band section. Sure enough, there was the picture of Zig, Tristan, Tori and I, all sitting in the band room, the three of us holding our instruments and Zig with his arms wrapped around me. Next to it was a picture of Zig and I that I'd forgotten about. This was the day that we'd found out that we'd both be going to our dream schools in New York City. Zig was sitting on the front steps of Degrassi, his legs spread out in front of him, me lounging in between them, leaning on his chest. His arms were wrapped around me lovingly and we were both holding out our acceptance letters, his to Columbia and mine to Julliard. His bright green eyes shone like emeralds, and he looked so perfect. I remembered that day like it was yesterday…

_*Flashback*_

"_Zig! Zig James Novak, where are you?" I'd yelled, running out of Degrassi. And then I spotted his blue polo and dark hair. He was casually lounging on the front steps, his skateboard and backpack next to his lanky frame. I raced toward him, my converse skidding on the pavement. _

"_ZIG NOVAK!" I yelled, jumping down the steps so I was in front of him. He was sitting there, staring at a thin envelope. It was really thin…almost too thin._

"_Maya!" he said, getting up and giving me a deep, meaningful kiss. I melted in his arms._

"_Oh Ziggy, I got it!" I laughed. He smiled too, and sat back down. I sat in his lap and he wrapped his arms around me._

"_I got mine too." He said. _

"_We'll finally be on our way." I smiled, reaching up to peck his cheek. His face was clammy and nervous. "What's wrong, Zig?" I asked. He sighed. _

"_The envelope…it's too thin." He said, turning it over in his hands. "It's a rejection letter, I know it is."_

"_Zig, don't think like that."_

"_Everyone knows that acceptance letters come in big, huge envelopes, stuffed with housing info and scholarship advise and financial aid and all that stuff." He sighed. I pulled my thin, white envelope out of my pocket._

"_Well then I'm rejected too." I said. he sighed._

"_Maya, you're an amazing musician!"_

"_And you're an amazing artist." I returned._

"_I don't feel amazing…I'm rejected." He said glumly._

"_Zig, you're brilliant. Now, c'mon. Open it up."_

"_It's gonna be a rejection." He fought._

"_You never know unless you try." I returned. He sighed, knowing I'd won, and we both took our letters into our shaking hands._

"_One," he said._

"_Two," I continued._

"_Three." We finished together. We ripped the paper open at the same exact second. I pulled my letter out and we watched each other as we both unfolded the one sheet of paper that was inside._

"_Dear Zig Novak," he started. I nodded him forward and he looked down. "We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted early admissions to Columbia University. We were very impressed with your achievements in the arts and expect the best. More information will be arriving closer to spring. Best regards, Columbia University." He read, his voice full of joy. I turned around and tackled him to the ground so I was lying on top of him, disguarding my letter into my purse. I attacked his lips with mine, hungrily biting his, our toungs dancing passionately._

"_Maya!" he said breathlessly. "I got in!"_

"_I know!" I squealed, attacking his lips again. People were whistling, laughing, making fun, but I didn't care. I just kissed Zig with every ounce of passion in my body. _

"_So what about you?" he asked more seriously, "Did you get in?" he asked. I met his eyes and smiled._

"_Yeah Zig, I got in. We'll be together forever." I promised. He smiled, and this time, he attacked my lips with his. _

"_Thank god." He said. "Thank god."_

I snapped back to reality and saw my students watching me. I remembered that one had asked me for a picture of Zig.

"Tall, dark hair, bright green eyes." I said, passing the book around. The students seemed impressed.

"Any other questions?" I asked.

"Yeah," a girl in the back holding a trumpet asked. "Does he have a little brother? Because he's hot!" She said. I blushed and laughed. Not sure how to respond to this, I decided to be funny. Zig would be.

"I know." I said, winking. They all laughed and then I passed out music books and staff paper.

"Alright, I let you pry into my personal life, time for me to pry into yours." I said.

"I'm going to give you all a notebook. In the notebook, I'll ask you to write down thoughts about music, bands, performers, TV shows, musicals, Broadway, any kind of music that interests you. This week, I want you to write about yourselves and how music helps you cope with life. Easy?" I asked, passing out a stack of colorful notebooks. They all nodded. "You'll have one a week, each due on Friday." I said. Everyone started to organize their new materials.

"The period is almost over, so just talk quietly amongst yourselves." I said, sitting down at my desk. I decided I liked the picture in the yearbook and copied it, then emailed it to myself. Zig would love it.

"If any of you would like to come in during your lunch period to learn a bit about the instrument you've picked, I'll be here." I offered. Everyone looked rather excited about this idea, and I was overjoyed. This teaching thing was fun; I loved the energy in the room. I loved helping people learn about music. The bell rang and everyone left. Maybe a new beginning was all I'd needed after all. But how new can my beginning really be when 99 percent of what I told them about myself was what I wish my life was like, not what I really was like.

Zig POV:

"Hello?" I asked, answering my phone.

"Is this a Mr. Novak?" a familiar voice asked.

"Yeah." I replied, sitting up in my chair.

"This is Mr. Niada." He said. I raised an eyebrow even though he couldn't see me.

"Ok?" I asked.

"Listen, I was your wife's boss. She has her final pay check here and I need you to come claim it." He said. I sighed. I could not walk into that place, I'd loose my cool.

"Do I have to?" I asked. He laughed at me.

"Yes! Now come, collect, and leave forever. Sound good?" he asked.

"Hell yeah." I replied.

"See ya soon."

"Whatever." I said, hanging up the phone. Then a thought occurred to me. I'd meet Maya for lunch and she could come with me. It would make me feel better.

I texted Maya, and when she didn't respond, I grabbed my keys.

"Barbra, I'm taking my lunch break." I told my assistant. She smiled and nodded.

"Sure thing Mr. Novak." She replied. I smiled gratefully and ran to the elevator. The thought of seeing Maya made my heart race and my stomach get butterflies. Which was weird, I'd never been nervous around Maya before. Except for that first day when I ran into her in Degrassi. That lost look in her eyes as she'd tried to find the music room…oh god, she made me feel like a fourteen year old boy again. I'll tell ya, that girl got me going. Our relationship now, whatever it was, was new and exciting. It had that new-love-honeymoon-stage written all over it. I just prayed that it'd last forever. That is, assuming our relation stats up again.

*At Degrassi*

Maya POV:

"Hey Mrs. Novak!" Said Maxine, walking into my classroom. I laughed.

"It's Matlin." I corrected. She waved me off and sat down.

"Potato potato." She said, using that classic excuse. I rolled my eyes as other kids came into the classroom. Soon almost every kid I had in my grade nine class filled the room. I smiled to myself, please with the turnout.

"Alright, so let's do this in two groups. People who know how to play their instrument over here," I said gesturing to one side of the room. "And people who need help, over here by the book shelves. Now," I started, but couldn't finish, because someone interrupted me.

"Maya!" A familiar voice called. My stomach instantly got butterflies. Then I realized how bad this situation was. Zig didn't know I was fake married to him.

I turned to see him leaning casually in the doorway, grinning. I smiled.

"Zig!" I said. Then Lexie ran in, dragging her cello behind her.

"Hey Mrs. Novak." She said, taking her seat. "Sorry I'm late; I had to get my cello out of my locker." Zig was beyond confused. I went over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. He raised an eyebrow and I ignored it.

"It's alright…" I hesitated. Kick made an awkward situation worse.

"Daddy!" Kick yelled, running over to Zig. He flung his arms around him and Zig gave him a kiss on his head.

"Hey little buddy! How are you?" Zig asked with too much enthusiasm.

"I'm good! I like mommy's work!" Kick said. I sighed.

"Class, this is my, er, husband." I said. Zig had that look on his face. The same look that had plastered his fourteen year old face at the Dot on the first day of grade nine…the look he gave me when I asked about Tori. The adorable, innocent, confused Zig look.

"Husband, huh?" he asked. I smiled and turned to him, pressing my lips together.

"Uh huh, sweetie, Simpson wanted me to tell the class about our son. And why he was here." I said, giving him a "we'll talk about it later" look. Something changed in his eyes at that statement. He grinned.

"Oh cool. I'm glad." He said, sitting in my chair and putting his feet up on my desk.

"Zig, get your feet down." I scolded. He laughed.

"Honey, please. It's okay." He assured me. I tried my best to smile and ignore him.

"Right." I said.

"Tell us about your honeymoon!" Maxine asked.

"Yes, tell us!" Lexie agreed.

"Well, Mrs. Novak and I," he said, emphasizing Novak. "had our honeymoon in Hawaii. And I serenaded her on the first night with my guitar." He said, winking at me. He was having way too much fun with this.

"He did not." I said. He laughed.

"Hey, Maya, remember how good I used to be on the symbols?" Zig asked, standing up and picking up a pair of symbols.

"Zig, don't." I warned.

"Oh c'mon, Maya. Remember how annoyed Tori used to get?" He laughed. I smiled and bit my lip to avoid laughing. Tori did always get pissed when Zig played with the instruments…

BANG! And he crashed them together, sending noise ringing around the room. Everyone laughed.

"You're even cuter in person." Lexie said, smiling at Zig. He chuckled.

"Maya, you showed the children those pictures of us?" Zig asked, referring to the ones we'd taken that first night in my new apartment…

"Zig! Of course I didn't!" I said, taken aback. "I showed them the yearbook." I said, handing it to him. He opened to the page I'd shown them and I watched his eyes change again as he looked at the picture of the four of us.

"The one with Tori." He whispered to himself, closing the book. He ran over to the book shelf and began scaning the bindings, looking for something. I was pretty sure I knew what it was.

"Maya, where's the one from Katie's graduating year?" he asked. I picked it up off my desk and handed it to him. My students watched the mini soapopera with wide eyes.

"Zig, please don't." I said. But he was already flipping through pages. Finally, he came to that fateful picture. That picture of him and Tori on the day of the football game. The day when I stole him from her.

"Maya, look!" he gasped, showing me the picture. It had also been the day of their first kiss.

"Zig, stop it. My students are here." I said. He just started down at the picture, tears forming in his eyes. He blinked them away.

"Wow…this was a long time ago." He said. To make things worse, Kick came over to see the picture.

"Mommy!" he cried, hugging Zig. This was too much. I started crying too.

"Oh T, why'd you leave us?" I wailed. Zig was crying now, adding to our wails.

"Ms. Matlin!" Simpson bellowed, coming into the room. Zig had had his arms around Kick and I, trying to comfort us. "In my office. Now."

I marched down the hallway with Zig and Kick in toe.

"Just like in high school." He whispered to me. I just kept silently crying. We walked inside the boring office and sat down. Mr Simpson's diplomas and teaching awards hung proudly on the wall next to his desk, as did various pictures of a tall blond that I recognized as Emma Nelson, a woman I recognized as his wife, and a young boy that was probably his son. I could tell he was trying to brighten up the room, but his failed attempt didn't help. I kept my eyes focused on his stern face as Zig slumped back in his chair, Kick in his lap.

"Well?" he asked. Zig decided to do the talking much to my gratitude.

"I came to surprise Maya for lunch, and because I needed her help with something. And she showed me a picture from high school, a picture of Tori and I, and I lost it. I'm sorry." Zig said. Kick just sat on his father's lap, looking scared.

"Maya, you promised." Simpson said. I noticed the stern lines of worry and anger in his face, and for the first time, I realized how old he was getting. He was no longer the energetic, slightly irritating principal that I'd had at Degrassi. No, for the first time since I'd known him, Mr. Simpson looked old and worn out.

"I had the students in class for lunch so they could learn a little about their new instruments…I'm sorry sir." I explained, trying to keep my voice calm and light.

"Maya…I'm going to have to fire you." he groaned, leaning back, closing his eyes, and rubbing his temple in frustration.

"What?" I shrieked. "On what grounds?" now I was infuriated! He couldn't do this, I had barely been here half a day!

"The grounds that you bring a child into the building, setting a bad example, and lying to your students!" Simpson said.

"I haven't even been here a day!" I fought, new tears welling up in my eyes.

"Simpson, this isn't fair!" Zig fought, sitting up straight and taking my hand under the desk where our former principal couldn't see. "This was my fault! Anything you want, I'll do it. Just let Maya keep her job."

"Well…we do need an art teacher." Simpson said.

"Anything but that." Zig said. "I have a real job."

"Teaching isn't a real job?" he raised an eyebrow. Zig bit his lip.

"I mean one I had to go to college for." Zig said. I turned to him.

"You don't have to go to college to be a teacher?" I asked. He looked back and forth between Simpson and I.

"I," he started carefully, watching every word. "I meant to say that teaching takes skill and a certain mind set…and we all know I don't have that." I shrugged in agreement.

"Very well, Mr. Novak. Then I'll offer you this: You can come in and speak to the students on career day about your real job, and I'll let Maya off the hook. You must also find a new source of care for your child, affective immediately." Simpson said, watching Zig. He squeezed my hand and I got butterflies in my stomach.

"Anything for Maya." He agreed, shaking Simpson's hand with the one that wasn't gripping mine. I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. Relief flooded my body and mind, freeing me from the terror almost being fired had caused me. Simpson stood.

"Maya, take the rest of the day off to find some new child care. I sware, you better be here on Career Day or so help me-" Simpson started to utter some repulsive threat before Zig interrupted.

"Don't worry, I won't let you down." He promised. Except somehow, I believed that those words Zig had said were for me, not Simpson.

"Alright class, go to lunch. I'm leaving." I said, entering my classroom. They all looked absolutely disappointed.

"Mrs. Novak, where are you going?" Max whined. I sighed, frowning at the name she'd addressed me by.

"I've been suspended." I muttered, placing my paperwork into my briefcase. Zig picked it up for me, and slung it over his shoulder, like he'd done in high school.

"Zig, I can carry that." I said, trying to take it away. He rolled his eyes as Kick took my hand.

"I've got it, sweetheart." He said quietly, calling me by the name he had in high school and college. I smiled to myself and turned to my students.

"I'm real sorry guys, I'll take you in for lunch tomorrow." I promised. This seemed to satisfy them and they all shuffled out of the room, one after another.

"Bye Mrs. Novak!" Max called. "Bye Mr. Novak." Zig waved to her and she left. Soon it was just the three of us in the classroom.

"What do you want for lunch?" Zig asked, giving me a smirk.

"A more important question comes to mind." I said, leaning against the desk and smiling up at Zig curiously. "Why are you here?"


End file.
